


In Which The Blood God And The Angel Of Death Adopt A Child

by orphan_account



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: And also bad memory, Angel of Death Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Bird Hybrid Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Blood God Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Child ranboo, Confused Technoblade, Enderman Hybrid Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Not enough technodad for my liking, Piglin Hybrid Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo Has Anxiety Disorder (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo has ADHD, So I made some, Technoblade Has ADHD (Video Blogging RPF), Technosoft, because I project onto him and also like cmon have you seen his videos?, but like platonically - Freeform, normalize bros adopting children together, peak adhd culture, technoblade and phil watson adopt ranboo, technodad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:01:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29762796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: The Blood God. Everyone has heard that name before. Whether in mythos, or hushed gossip behind merchant’s stalls, the Blood God is a being to be feared. He is violent and cutthroat, slaying all who dare stand between him and his goals. He has been used to fight wars, to topple governments, to obliterate whole countries. It's safe to say that the Blood God is not known for kindness. However, The Blood God, tired of fighting in mortal’s wars, goes into retirement. He lived for years in peace, until one night, an anxious and freezing hybrid knocks at his door. And well, ruthless as he is, The Blood God has never been able to deny a child.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), Ranboo & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade & Phil Watson
Comments: 10
Kudos: 325
Collections: Found family for when I need something to project onto





	In Which The Blood God And The Angel Of Death Adopt A Child

**Author's Note:**

> My last fic got AttentionTM so now I have the happy chemicals. Anyway I wrote this instead of doing school, and I think it's p pogchamp. This is gonna have multiple chapters, and I've never done something like this, so updates may be sparse or sporadic. Depends on the day with my adhd ass. Also, another thing, Alps by Novo Amor? Slaps. That is all

Peaceful nights of reading by a crackling fire was what Technoblade enjoyed most about his retirement. He loved being able to curl up in his chair with a book, usually a collection of myths, and relax without having to anticipate an attack. Tonight, it was Ion by Euripides.

* * *

_Xuthus. Ó my son , hail ! for the beginning of the address is becoming to me._

_Ion . I am well ; but do thou at least be prudent, and both of us [lit. we being two), shall do well._

_Xuthus. Grant me the ( privilege of ] kissing thine hand and embracing thy person._

_Ion . Art thou indeed in thy right senses, O stranger ! or has some affliction from the god maddened thee ?_

_Xuthus. I am in my right senses, since having found my dearest ( son ), I am eager to embrace him_

_Ion . Desist ; lest touching the fillets of the god, thou mayst break them with thine hand._

_Xuthus . I will touch thee ; still I do not seize thee as my own property ; but I find (here) my beloved son._

_Ion . Wilt thou not release me before thou receivest my arrows in thy lungs ?_

_Xuthus. Why then dost thou fly from me, after having discovered thy own dearest (father) ?_

_Ion . I am not inclined to bring to their senses rude and frantic strangers._

_Xuthus. Slay me and burn me; for if thou slayest me, thou wilt be thy father's murderer._

_Ion . But how art thou my father ? Is it not ridiculous for me to listen to these things ?_

_Xuthus. No ; a hurried narrative would explain to thee my circumstances._

_Ion . And what wilt thou tell me?_

_Xuthus. I am thy father, and thou art my son ._

* * *

A knock at the door interrupted the peace. The old god jumped, hand reflexively reaching for his sword. It brought some comfort. With a sigh, he got up from his chair, removing his glasses and setting them on top of his book. Technoblade expected a few people to be at his door. His old friend, Philza, the Angel Of Death. Maybe Dream, the God of Chaos and War. What he did not expect was a child. A lanky thing, with candy apple eyes, black and white skin split seemingly down the middle, with hair that followed suit. Technoblade stared at the child, who avoided the eye contact like the plague, not knowing what to do.

“I-I’m sorry if I bothered you, sir.” the child said, meekly wringing their hands

“It’s fine.” replied an equally awkward Techno. Oh lord, he wasn’t equipped to handle children, that was always Phil’s strong suit. _‘What would Phil do?’_ he asked himself. He was jolted back to reality when the child sneezed. “Uh, come in, kid.” He stepped aside and opened the door wider

“I wouldn’t want to intrude.” said the kid, wiping their nose with a sniff

“Just get inside.” snapped Techno, harsher than intended. The kid squeaked and quickly made their way inside, nearly tripping over their feet. Technoblade sighed, closed the door, and turned to face the kid. “What’s your name?”

“Ranboo.”

“Okay Ranboo, uh…” his eyes darted around the room. “Sit down over there, and I’ll get you a blanket or somethin’, okay?”

Ranboo nodded and sat down in the chair Technoblade gestured to. It was seated in front of a fire, an empty chair beside it, with an open book and golden glasses. His chest squeezed in guilt at having interrupted the piglin. He shouldn’t have come here, he should have gone somewhere else. No, he shouldn’t have left at all-

“Here.” Said Techno, plopping a blanket on the kid’s lap. Ranboo blinked, then teared up, which sent Techno into a panic. He knelt in front of Ranboo, unsure of what to do. “H-hey, don’t cry, uh.. Please?” 

“I’m sorry.” Ranboo hid his face, feeling sick to his stomach from shame. He felt awful for bothering Technoblade.

“... do you need a hug?”

The kid looked up at Techno, startled by the question. A tear slipped down his cheek and he whimpered at the resulting sting. He nodded with a sniffle. Technoblade opened his arms, knowing he wasn’t the most.. welcoming looking person on the planet. He was scared, almost, of making a wrong move. Ranboo launched himself into the piglin’s arms and cried into his shirt. Techno picked the blanket up from where it resided on the chair and wrapped it around the kid before returning the embrace. He was self aware of how.. large he was in comparison to Ranboo. Gods, he hoped he wasn’t crushing the kid.

“Th.. thank you.” mumbled Ranboo. The crying had calmed into the occasional sniff by then.

“No problem, Ranboo.”

Ranboo found himself not wanting to let go. Techno was warm, and warm was good, warm was safe. He yawned and nuzzled into his chest, feeling himself beginning to drift off. He was exhausted from the day; the journey, the emotions, it all took a toll on him. Technoblade sighed and stood up, adjusting the kid until he had Ranboo’s weight against his chest, an arm looped under his legs for support. Ranboo let out a small enderman-like chirp at the sudden movement, but then relaxed once more, wrapping arms around Techno’s neck.

Technoblade wordlessly climbed up the ladder to the attic, going slow because while dropping the kid would be a little funny, it was not ideal. He placed Ranboo down on his bed, taking the kid’s arms off of his neck. This was met with half-asleep protest.

“Don’t leave.. Please.” murmured Ranboo, looking up at him with those wide eyes of his. Technoblade sighed and sat down on the bed next to him, hands placed awkwardly in his lap.

“I won’t.”

This made the kid smile, and he curled up, adjusting the blanket. His tail and part of his legs were sticking out, but he didn’t seem to mind at all. Soon enough, he fell asleep, leaving Technoblade alone with his thoughts. He looked down at the kid, at Ranboo, and frowned at how soft the sight made him. And- Gods, he was already attached, wasn’t he?

“What have I gotten myself into..?” he asked under his breath, the question directed to no one in particular. Predictably, no answer came, the only sounds being the kids soft breathing and the muffled crackle of a wood fire.

**Author's Note:**

> Re-reading this, I realize there are quite a few mistakes that I didn't quite catch when I posted. If anyone reading would be interested in helping me beta, it'd be appreciated. I have discord, twitter, and a few others. Thank you for reading, giving kudos, and commenting. It makes my day <3


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